Tuesday, April 15, 2014

WIAW: Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes!

Hello, my loves! Guess what, I have good news for you. 


Because that intro was in italics, clearly it means that wasn't my real intro, just a tidbit of reading for your convenience. ;)
Gracias, Jenn!!

So, I have been going back and forth about how to bring a certain topic up for the past week or so now. As you all know, I've kind of been, on a personal level, down. I also mentioned that I decided to reach out for help to get things back on track.I admitted that I'm okay with not being perfect. And guess what? I'm feeling so much better!!! Talking things out, and reaching out for support helps so incredibly much, guys. I can't even explain how much better I feel.

However, there is one last thing. After several years focusing on my mental health (which has totally paid off and been worth it), there is still that one problem that has been lingering in my physical health. I've been dealing with amenhorrea for a few years now. I have stressed over and over again about how I know that this is no bueno, and have vowed countless times to change my ways, but the truth is, is none of my plans really panned out.

Almond milk, blueberries, spinach....

...Apple Spice Oatmeal with almond butter

Almond milk, banana, spinach.....

....pancakes, banana, chia seeds, peanut butter

Almond milk, banana, spinach....

....Cinnamon Raisin Ezekial Toast, peanut butter, chia seeds, and fresh fruit

The thing is, is I knew what to do, yet I did not know how to do it. After being plain unhappy, nonexistent motivation to exercise, a strained relationship with food, and ultimately a doctor's visit, I decided that I was fed up with trying to figure things out on my own. Because obviously it wasn't working.

Spinach+veggies, black beans, 1/2 avocado, balsamic dressing, whole wheat tortilla, clementines

Lettuce, carrots, bell peppers, cucumbers with leftover brown rice+teryaki chicken w/ peanut sauce

Turkey+avocado wrap, pear, baby carrots, trail mix

 I took a leap of faith, and contacted the amazingtastical Robyn to help me out! Ya'll, she is so, so wise, and I felt so informed and a personal connection with our consultation. She and I discussed everything that's been going on she constructed a plan, finally a structured plan, to help me deal with this once and for all.

Brown rice, stir-fried veggies/chicken, Sunbutter sauce drizzled on top

Grilled chicken, homemade bun {toasted} spread w/ coconut oil, side salad w/ balsamic dressing

Thai Chicken Veggie Wraps with peanut sauce and brown rice - that's a full-sized dinner plate, friends!!

So, the plan? - well, eat more (a LOT more), and rest more. My meals and snacks are definitely changing, as well as my exercise. You won't see me running a whole lot (aka at all). I've been enjoying walking, hiking, and yoga lately! The whole point is to heal my body, metabolism, and reproductive system through good nutrition and rest.

Tall decaf, Evolution Cocoa and Nut Bar, Evolution freeze-dried fruit

Pear+almond butter

Sugar snap peas+trail mix

School snacks! Kashi Cherry Dark Chocolate granola bar, clemmies, and a Larabar

I debated even mentioning this, but it's a change in my lifestyle. Yep, my lifestyle, not a quick fix, and I felt that it was important to talk about, and hopefully provide some inspiration/motivation to others in recover/dealing with amenhorrea/HA.

I understand that it's not going to be easy all the time. I understand that weight gain, is, indeed, inevitable. I will not be posting any specifics, numbers, etc. I am embracing the rest that I need, and honestly, enjoying it. If there's a day where I feel like doing nothing, then I am gonna let myself totally relax! If I want extra peanut butter (which is always), then I am gonna give myself another spoonful! If I have a hard day, then I am just gonna have to push through.

Yes, I have an apprehension for the unknown. I have "fat fears" every so often, and doubts every so often. But I need this, I need this for my health, and I am so ready and blessed. What better time to start? Why wait until later on in my life? I have my whole life ahead of me, and if lots of food and rest (and yes, even weight gain) is what I need right now, then gosh dangit, I'm gonna give myself that.

So there you go! My ch-ch-ch-changes. :) I'm so happy to be taking this next step in life and I know that awesome things are to come!!

Have a happy, blessed Wednesday!


  1. First of all: WOOHOO HIGH SPEED INTERNET!!! Say goodbye to any free time you once had lol :)

    I am SO PROUD of you for getting real help! Robyn is AMAZING! And I'm so happy you're feeling better. Isn't is awesome?!

    All of your meals look so super duper yummy!!! Can I come live with you?! lol! Seriously though, someday I want to come stay with you :) love ya girly!

    1. Yeeaahhhh man!!

      Thank you so much, love! It is amazing that I feel so much better already!

      Thanks girl, I try ;) - and YES I would love for you to come visit! I need quality time with somma my blends. Plus we need to get you out of the arctic! ;) Love you too, girl!!

  2. Jessica, you are so strong and beautiful!! Right now you are a huge inspiration to me. I am really struggling mentally with food right now. More than ever before. I'm so glad you reached out for help and I hope I can too, soon. My mom keeps saying she will call someone but I guess it just slips her mind a lot. I'm dealing with the whole loss-of-a-period thing as well (for a long time now!) and I hope that someday I can find the balance my body needs. Thank you and good luck on your journey!! :)

    1. Emily - YOU are!! YOU are an inspiration! Just acknowledging that you need to reach out takes some crazy courage, and it is always worth it in the end.

      Maybe you could be a little more firm with your Mom, like really sit her down, have a serious discussion with her, and I'm sure that she would listen! Moms always want to do what's right for their children, and if you affirm that you need help, I think you'll get good feedback (I speak from experience). Hope that helps!

      And I know you will one day, chica! You are strong and amazing! Love you!

  3. Awesome post girl! :) Love your insta account- and can very much relate to you! Proud of you and you are gonna rock this! Thanks for making me droll over your meals alll.the.time. ;)

    1. Thank you so much!! Have an awesome day! :)