Springtime Love

Woo, after writing my last post, I'm feeling much better!!

 

To jumpstart my enthusiasm for trust, I began participating in the She Reads Truth devotional. And of course this is the topic they've been discussing:

 

 

 

 

Ah, the way God works. :)

 

 

I (plus the bro and sis) am currently on spring break, and there is plenty of fantastic weather and free time.

 

On Monday I got a baking urge, and I had the right ingredients for, duh, muffins. Ha.

 

 

Whilst baking, the weather was so great that I just opened up some windows to let the sweet, warm breeze into the house.

 

 

 

The kit-kats quite enjoy the sunshine - it gives them even more reason to lounge around.

 

 

One of my favorite transitions into spring besides the temps is the change in colors! I am loving these cherry blossoms and bright nail colors!

 

 

 

 

 

I have been definitely been getting my outside time and soaking in some sun - walks, as always. One included breaking in my new kicks shoes that I loooovveee.

 

 

 

 

Yesterday I went in the heat of the day (around 3-ish), but I loved working up a nice sweat. My walking paces are getting faster, I think I've shaved off around 10+ minutes of my normal route.

 

 

 

 

The new bangs have not made an appearance this week. My go-to hair has been the side braid with an awkward pinned-back-poof-thingy - lazy hair at its best!

 

I've also had some good eats, including yesterday's dinner.....

 

 

Grilled shrimp w/ Cajun finishing butter, roll, and a big 'ole salad.

 

....eaten on the porch with this awesome kiddo:

 

Pizza face!

 

Have an awesome day!

 

 

 

 



Shooting for the Stars

Firstly, can I get a hallelujah for the spring break weather?!

 

 

 

It couldn't be a more convenient week to get awesome temps (we're ignoring Thursday and Friday's forecasts). This means that my flat-iron is going into hibernation pretty soon, but I'll deal with that when the time comes. So are my scarves and boots and sweaters! Ahh!

 

Before my train of thought choo-choos off into the sunset, I have a pretty important topic that just sort of came to my mind I thought I'd share on the 'ole blog.

 

Every human has two things that I think goes hand-in-hand: hopes and dreams.

 

 

Life tends to throw things at us that we don't expect/don't want - how we deal with them is our choice. It could be as small as perhaps a plan getting cancelled or as big as depression.

 

 

In any case, everything affects our dreams and future. For me, being a religious person, I believe that God knows every single moment and experience in our life, beginning to end, but He presents us with opportunities and challenges we either pass or accept.

 

 

Sometimes, these don't line up with the way we try to plan our lives to be. That's why we get disappointed so often.

 

 

Now, this may come as a surprise, but I'm a bit of a control freak when it comes to life. I can analyze and overanalyze every single part of my life, every single day, however tiny the event. To the extreme, it gets exhausting, confusing, and stressful.

 

 

I preach and preach about self-care and letting go, but I admit: sometimes I struggle to just go with the flow and trust God.

 

 

Yes, our choices add up to our future, and we can't just sit around doing nothing (as in: "Oh, God's got me covered. I'll just wait.") - God and His Word are our guides. Literally every single time I open the Word, I find verses that pertain to my situation/problem/etc.

 

 

In the midst of my eating disorder, I had neither hopes or dreams. My life revolved around food, calories, and my body.

 

When I started to learn how to cope with/overcome my anxieties and obsessions, I found myself having a rather difficult time discovering what were my hopes and dreams. I was (and still am) going through that stage in life of, "Who am I? What's my purpose? What am I aspiring to do and be?"

 

 

I like to think I've gotten glimpses of answers. Thoughts. I get questioned about why I talk about food a lot on the blog and my answer is, well, because I like it. I've said before that coming out of what I've been through, food is seen through completely different eyes. Actually, pretty much everything has.

 

 

What are my dreams right now? Well, I want to go into medicine. I want to be an RD - something I've been struggling internally with for quite a while, seeing my history. I just have this overwhelming feeling that I want to teach others what I've learned, and what has changed my life. Trials and tribulations meant for the glory of God, and I want to change other peoples' lives.

 

 

Will this happen? Who knows. But I definitely feel this strong pull from this career opportunity, and I am praying hard about it. I'm only 16, but God plants seeds in our hearts for a reason. So, I'm just going to go with the flow. I want to enjoy this season in my life, this season of hopes and dreams. Sometimes I just gotta let go and trust my omniscient Daddy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 







More Muffins.

Spring is finally coming. FINALLY.

 

Georgia weather is notorious for being all. over. the. place. The overcast skies and mediocre temps just get....bleh. For the past few weeks I have been obsessively checking the weather waiting for warmth.

 

Ah, the wait is worth it, friends.

 

 

Although this outside girl loves all the seasons, it's time to ditch the long-sleeves and gray skies. You know?

 

 

 

Well, I don't have much else to say, so I suppose I should get to the point of the title. I do indeed have another muffin recipe.

 

You're welcome.

 

These babies are banana-y, chocolatey, gooey, and comforting. Did I also mention they're naturally sweetened, packed with antibiotics, vitamins, minerals, and they're vegan?

 

 

  I confess that I'm always a little insecure when I present something I've baked to my family because....well....I've had a few mishaps (read: tasting like cardboard/too much salt/so on). But these kids are winners.

 

Le star: black bananas. Nature's sugar. The dark chocolate provides the antibiotics (learned from Robyn, whose blog I got this from!), and I love the hint of banana.

 

 

 

Don't shy away!

 

Vegan [Gluten-free] Banana-Chocolate Chip Muffins

adapted from the The Real Life RD

 

  

3 mashed ripe bananas

2 1/4 cups whole wheat pastry flour

3/4 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/8 tsp salt

2 tsp vanilla extract

1/2 cup applesauce (I had old-fashioned so I used that)

1/2 cup brown sugar

1/3 cup almond milk

1/2 cup dark chocolate chips

 

 Directions:

Preheat oven to 350*

Mix flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt in a bowl. On top, stir in mashed bananas, applesauce, vanilla, brown sugar, and almond milk - until JUST mixed. Then gently fold in the chocolate chips - you don't want to over-mix or else they'll be dense.

Scoop into a greased or lined muffin tin.

 

 Bake for 15-17 minutes.

Easy as pie muffins!

 

 

 

Mmmm, I'm hungry. I actually used old-fashioned applesauce cuz that's what we had (work with watcha got!), but if you're watching added sugars, I'd just suggest reducing the turbinado sugar or using all-natural applesauce.

 

 

I had so many chocolate chips left that I baked cookies to bring to my neighbors! :)

 

Have a fantastic evening!

 



Weekend Roundup

Happy Monday Evening!

Today is super rainy, and I thought I'd pop in since I haven't posted since Wednesday.

We had a weekend full of errands. Starting with getting my hair done!!

 

Bangs? Check. Red? Double check. My hair stylist did a fantastic job. She's a trooper (my sister and mom also got their hair done)!

 

Afterwards we took a quick trip to Tarjay to pick up some activities for the kids I was babysitting that night, and Rue 21 so I could get my first "springy" shirt in honor of the gorgeous weather. :)

 

 

Mandatory Starbucks run.

 

 

The awesome weather + time change were amaazzziingg (and helpful for babysitting)!

 

The bro and I took advantage of it and hung outside for a little bit before I had to leave.

 

 

 

Scenic.

 

Twister + 65 degrees + bouncy balls = happy kiddos and happy babysitter!

 

Sunday consisted of sleeping in til noon (say what?!) and notesnotesnotes. Test this Thursday....

 

 

Afternoon chocolate euphoria.

 

 

And that night, more watching kiddos. That's why they pay me the big bucks, yo.

 

Kidding.

 

Lilly says adios!

 

 

 

 

WIAW

These past couple of weeks have been nonstop.

 

I am so ready to driiiiiiiiiivvee (on my own). Must. Practice.

 

I did get a few snapshots of some yummy eats this week!

 

 

Thanks Jenn!

 

 

 

Picked up this little fellow at the grocery store: red Bartlett pear. He was stirred into some (watery) overnight oats.

 

 

No pics of lunches, because all were eaten at school. :) I eat lots of wraps/salads.

 

Snack while doing school work:

 

 

 

I originally thought the Larabar I picked up was Cappuccino, therefore super excited, but this lil guy was super yummy! Like a Reese's.

 

I've discussed not needing caffeine at 4 pm, but researching the history of US Standard of Living requires some java, dangit.

 

Dinners:

 

 

Stir-fry and delizioso spaghetti my mama made. Plus water: so much water. I need 10-12 cups of water to actually feel quenched and refreshed during the day.

 

Lastly, the usual evening snack of:

 

 Oh! Before I forget, my new obsession:

 

 

Must retrieve more!

 



March Flurries

I can't believe this weather!

 

For Georgia, snow in March is a bit unusual. We normally start feeling some spring weather around this time!

 

Saturdays are not always my favorite, considering I wake up before everyone else. Me and the kitties are normally the only ones up for an hour or so. Boredom sets in quickly.

 

 Coffee helps.

 

 

I finally got some Sunbutter (!!). It's made from roasted sunflower seeds, and sooo delicious. Plus rich in minerals and the antioxidant vitamin E.

 

 

Chunky.

 

 

Breakfast was literally one of the best combos I've ever had!!!

 

 Plain Greek yogurt, Wheaties, mango, banana, and sunbutter.

 

The stars:

 

 

Mmmm. Mangos. Eaten while doing weekend homework (cough cough that may or may not have included a SpongeBob marathon).

 

After weekend chores, I bundled up for a flurry-filled walk.

 

Top bun hair = dire need of hair trim.

 

 

It makes me so sad when people say, "Ugh, I hate the cold" or "I wish summer was here, winter sucks." I actually prefer my walks in the cold - it makes me feel more awake and energized. Although I admit, I normally return home Jessica the red-nosed-chapped-lips reindeer chica.

 

The rest of my afternoon looked like this:

 

 

Gotta love interpreting poems and writing essays.

 

And some necessary relax time. I'm serious, people - if I don't have some alone time during the day....yeah, then you'd want to leave me alone. ;)  

 

 

 

My idea of relaxation always, always involves reading and nailpolish. FTW. I had hoped to bake some homemade granola bars, but that'll have to wait for another time!!

 

The good news: homework completed, to bed at a decent time! Nighty night, loves.

 

 

 



NEDA Week: Physical Freedom

*Caution: This has some Ed/exercise related discussions. Read at your own discretion.*

 

Hello loves! I am indeed still here.

 

 

And making crazy faces, apparently. One of many.

 

Just to let ya'll know, it doesn't really matter if I go three hours or three months without posting - I'm not going to stop blogging. It's on my mind often, life just happens.

 

I love you all too much. ;)

 

So as some of you may know, this week was National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. It's been a mix of emotions for me, and many others too.

 

 

 

NEDA Week means donning the purple! <3

 

It rolled around and hit me all of a sudden - this month has been go go go. (Birthdays! Projects! Babysitting!) NEDA Week has reminded me to take a step back and reflect on all that I've been working for the past two years.

 

I know that I tend to frequently gush and rant about recovery and freedom from Ed, but I feel that there is seriously no way I can express how worth it it is. Think about it: has your life ever spun a 180? It's pretty freakin awesome!

 

In honor of NEDA Week, I thought I'd give you a few updates considering I've posted recipes and WIAW the past couple of times.

 

Friends, I am flying higher than I ever have.

 

First: I pretty much have free reign over any physical activity of my choosing. Yuh huh, you read correctly! *Happy dance.*

 

Can I just say? Long. Time. Comin'. Months and months of being sedentary followed by months and months of monitored light exercise followed by months and months of short, light exercise on my time, and now I have finally achieved this goal.

 

Whoop whoop.

 

Peeps, this is not saying I'm going to be training for a marathon or joining a swim team or taking up judo. I love my walks and Just Dance and hiking but this girl's gotta have some variety.

 

 

 So what do I think finally helped me achieve this goal?

 

Well, many (many many many....many) things/epiphanies/enlightenments/whatever you'd like to call them. One obviously important factor is the fact of my relationship with food.

 

I know how to listen to my hunger and fullness cues, satisfy cravings, replenish myself accurately, treat myself, yada yada.

 

Another is my relationship with exercise (thanks, Captain Obvious!).

 

Friends, I've stressed a hundredandtwentyfivegazillion times that I love. to. move. And talk, but mostly move. In full-fledged Ed days, this was not a factor of my well-being or enjoyment.

 

Something that naturally releases endorphins and energizes left me feeling worse and lethargic.

 

*Note: I was never categorized an "over-exerciser" (as in, 3 hours a day on the treadmill), but for my weight range? Yeeeaaahhh too much.*

 

 

These two problematic situations have kind of instilled this fear in myself and family members of anything strenuous. I stick to walks (whoop whoop), stationary bike, yoga, and weights.

 

Truth be told, running is my first exercise love. I loved it before Ed, I've loved, ahem, the concept of it ever since leaving outpatient, and I love it now.

 

CONFESSION: I actually got permission to jog months ago, but have been too afraid to post about it, discuss it with family, or attempt it. I have frequent discussions with God about why I feel I'm in such a dilemma. Just eat adequately, take a run, eat adequately, and that's it!

 

Easier said than done, my friends. Easier said than done. This to me shows the scary side of recovery: Ed and Satan are shown who's boss. It's more anxiety-producing, fearful, and stressful than you'd expect - letting go of Ed in another way.

 

However, I refuse to let my anxieties and fears overshadow my successes and triumphs. What does the Lord say? "Be anxious about nothing, instead pray about everything." "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." "For I know the plans I have for you."

 

I think that NEDA Week is a perfect opportunity to reflect on these verses. What are you not putting into God's hands? How much do you lean on Him, and only Him, for strength? What do you feel HE has in store for you?

 

 

~XOXOXO~